poem for a Sunday morning

Poor, Sleepy Eutychus

Poor, sleepy Eutychus,
A-sittin' without squirmin',
Perching on a window ledge
To hear an endless sermon.

Now his eyes are droopy,
Sittin' way up high;
Poor, sleepy Eutychus
Is just about to die.

Saint Paul keeps on a-preachin'
To our hero snoozin' hard;
Then Euty leans into the air
And crashes in the yard.

But Paul is an apostle,
Quite unlike other men;
Down he runs to Eutychus
And gives him life again.

So if you're gonna sleep in church,
Don't from a window fall;
The man up front a-preachin'
Is not Apostle Paul.

-John Knapp II, taken from My Book of Bible Rhymes

gymnastics!

At my 3-year-old's well check appointment, Josiah's pediatrician observed him spinning around and bouncing in his chair. "You may want to try enrolling him in gymnastics," was her advice to me as a winter outlet for some of his energy.

After a friend mentioned her granddaughter enjoyed this class, I did some research and then signed Josiah up. He LOVES it and spends all week counting down to gymnastics day. I love that I get to watch him spend 50 minutes following someone else's directions! But this class is so much more than gymnastics as they integrate preschool activities, and that makes it fun to watch, too. I can't wait to try some of their ideas at home with him!

This week's opening activity was a matching game. The kids picked up a magnetic letter, and then ran across the room to find a bucket with a letter that matched, and dropped it in.

The kids doing a crab walk. Josiah constantly looks to make sure I'm watching.

"Airplane arms" on the balance beam. Yesterday Josiah told me he wants to be an airplane when he grows up.

An elevated balance beam with a new twist: step over the ducks, which were little, medium, and big. Last week they used snakes until Josiah got scared. The snakes got put away.

Getting ready to do a front roll. "Arms up."

And roll!

Jumping on the trampoline is Josiah's favorite activity!

sugar and spice and a few things unexpected...

"It's a girl!" I remember the joy of hearing those words exactly nine years ago today. I had a precious 2-year-old son at home, so knew well some of the joys of having a little boy. I had hoped that one day I would also get to experience the world of little girls, and now I held one in my arms.

That first day of getting to know Rachel, I looked at her fuzzy brown hair and imagined the day it would hold pigtails and hair bows. Dresses of pink, ribbon, and lace danced across my imagination, and her closet soon filled with baby girl gifts: dainty outfits fit for a princess. Baby dolls and bottles waited on the shelves for her to play with. I couldn't wait to engage her in all things girl.

That little Rachel grew up, and fussed whenever I tried to do her hair. Pony tails hurt, ribbons were too cute for her liking. People complimented her when she wore a dress, which was too much for a child who disliked being the center of attention. Besides, her legs got cold, and dresses were just uncomfortable. Dolls were not interesting and the color pink too...um, pastel.

Wanting my daughter's heart more than her hair, I gave up trying to put it up except on special occasions. But she loves to wear it long, and it is beautiful tucked behind her ears. We found simple dresses combined with leggings were more to her liking, and she is learning how to say "thank you" with a smile when someone compliments her appearance. Gold and silver have emerged as her favorite colors. Baby dolls were out but Kit Kittredge became a good friend. Two girls moved in next door, and suddenly she began to see her more feminine interests were not weird, they just weren't shared by her brothers. After spending extended playtime with these girls (the youngest of whom is rarely caught in pants), she sometimes emerges from her room wearing (gulp!) a dress and plastic jewelry.

Rachel loves history, writing in her journal, and she studies hard. She's a dog-lover, wants to learn how to sew, play guitar, and wire electricity, and relishes time in the kitchen, cooking. She begged me for a year to get her ears pierced, and carries a purse to church stuffed with the latest and most beloved animal friend. Her sense of humor borders on the absolutely silly, her giggles are contagious, and her friendships plentiful but precariously strung on the thread of a sensitive heart. When we filled out a checklist to compare our mother/daughter interests, we were almost complete opposites. I love how this child continues to enlarge my understanding of what it means to be a girl.

Happy 9th birthday, Rachel! I'm so thankful to have you as my daughter!!! It is a joy to discover how has God wired you and see His life and plan unfolding in you.

Trust

When is the time to trust?
Is it when all is calm,
When waves the victor's palm,
And life is one glad psalm
Of joy and praise?
Nay! but the time to trust
Is when the waves beat high,
When storm clouds fill the sky,
And prayer is one long cry,
O help and save!

When is the time to trust?
Is it when friends are true?
Is it when comforts woo,
And in all we say and do
We meet but praise?
Nay! but the time to trust
Is when we stand alone,
And summer birds have flown,
And every prop is gone,
All else but God.

What is the time to trust?
Is it some future day,
When you have tried your way,
And learned to trust and pray
By bitter woe?
Nay! but the time to trust
Is in this moment's need,
Poor, broken, bruised reed!
Poor, troubled soul, make speed
To trust thy God.

What is the time to trust?
Is it when hopes beat high,
When sunshine gilds the sky,
And joy and ecstasy
Fill all the heart?
Nay! but the time to trust
Is when our joy is fled,
When sorrow bows the head,
And all is cold and dead,
All else but God.

-taken from Streams in the Desert

extravagant love

Mary had spent time with Jesus, sitting under His teaching and hanging upon his every word. Her heart had been almost broken under the pain of her brother's death, and in spite of herself, she had wondered, "Jesus, where are You?" Somehow she knew He could have spared their family this sorrow, could have prevented her brother's death. Four days later He came to them, and the glory He had revealed through Lazarus' resurrection was far beyond anything she had ever dreamed Jesus to be. Not only had He shared in her grief, which ministered deeply to her sensitive soul, He had brought her brother back from the dead! Surely this was the Messiah, for in Him was life.

Passover drew near. Mary considered her love for her Lord, and knew how she wanted to demonstrate this love to Him.

"Six days before the Passover, Jesus arrived at Bethany, where Lazarus had lived, whom Jesus had raised from the dead. Here a dinner was given in Jesus' honor. Martha served, while Lazarus was among those reclining at the table with him. Then Mary took about a pint of pure nard, an expensive perfume; she poured it on Jesus' feet and wiped his feet with her hair. And the house was filled with the fragrance of the perfume." John 12:1-3

As I've mulled over Mary's devotion to Jesus while studying John 12, the last sentence of verse three seemed to fly off the pages of my Bible. What is the measure of my devotion to Jesus? What fragrance fills my life? What sort of atmosphere permeates my home, my friendships, my relationships with family members, church members, or those I meet as I make my way around my community?

Is it one of indifference to the things of God?
Selfish ambitions that don't take time to seek out the cares and concerns of those I come in contact with?
Shallow conversations which reflect timidity, a lack of treasuring people, a selfish agenda, or unwillingness to venture into subjects which may be hard to talk about?

Or do those around me catch glimpses of:
A heart that treasures and meditates upon God's word, putting it into action?
A love for God that translates into a love for the people He has made, broken though they may be by this world?
A spirit that is unshaken by circumstances because she knows the God who is sovereign over them?
A willingness to pursue others' hearts without pushing my own agenda?

In the parallel passage in Mark, it says Mary broke her jar, pouring the perfume on Jesus' head. What am I withholding from Him, that stops the spread of the fragrance of sweet perfume?

Is it fear of being hurt?
Fear of looking silly?
Fear of things that might be hard?
Unwillingness to part with some idol, right now more beloved than Jesus Himself?

He held nothing back from me, not even His own life, comfort, or glory. Isn't He worth my best and most valuable gift? May He find my offering of love to be a pleasing aroma: a life fully poured out to Him, whatever the cost.

every day, A-Z

God's Word
A-admired it.
B-believed it.
C-carried it.
D-defended it.
E-enjoyed it.
F-feasted upon it.
G-gleaned it.
H-held it.
I-interpreted it.
J-judged it.
K-kept it.
L-loved it.
M-memorized it.
N-needed it.
O-opened it.
P-preached it.
Q-quoted it.
R-read it.
S-studied it.
T-taught it.
U-understood it.
V-valued it.
W-wondered about it.
X-examined it.
Y-yielded to it.
Z-zealously hid it in his heart.

-by John Knapp II, taken from My Book of Bible Rhymes

After being urged at least three times by three different sources to read through the entire Bible with our children before they leave home, our family is trying this plan, which will take us through most of it in one year: http://www.ewo.org/general/oneStep/reading_track_2010.pdf Check out the EWO website under "One Step Further" for other options listed as well.

It's only January, but we have high hopes! The kids are excited, and getting out of bed earlier each morning to read on their own, too. (Their idea...I'm constantly astounded by God's grace in our very imperfect parenting!)

help for Haiti

There are a lot of great organizations raising money for help in Haiti. Here's one of my favorites because of the way they combine relief work with sharing the gospel:
www.samaritanspurse.org.

quite a scare

"BEEP-BEEP-BEEP! BEEP-BEEP-BEEP!" The alarm cut through the stillness of the night, quickly rousing my husband and I out of an already-deep sleep. The clock read 10:45 p.m.

"What is it?" I asked, sleepily stumbling out of bed.

"The carbon monoxide detector," he responded. That news put an extra sense of urgency in my steps and I tried as hard as I could to think. What should we do? I could hear my 11-year-old from his bedroom, asking if we should get out of the house.

I found my way downstairs, grabbed my phone, and looked through our phone book, trying to find the number to call for the fire department. All I could find was 911. "Isn't that for emergencies?" I wondered, hesitant to call and not yet understanding this WAS an emergency. By now my husband was downstairs, monitor in hand, and we watched as the numbers on the digital display clicked down to zero. Not knowing what else to do, I dialed 911.

After a quick chat with the dispatcher, we quickly got the kids out of bed, into their coats, and out of the house per her directions. My husband backed the van out of the garage and we waited for the fire truck to arrive. (This, of course, was the best part of the whole day for my 3-year-old!)

After checking our house, the firemen discovered high levels of carbon monoxide on the second floor, in the bedrooms where we had just been sleeping. After enjoying a fire in our fireplace, the damper had been shut prematurely, causing the CO gas to build up. The firemen told us if we hadn't gotten out when we did, things would have been bad. They congratulated us on having one of the best CO detectors on the market, a Kidde NightHawk with a digital display. We had bought our house from a fireman who knew what he was doing when he installed this monitor in our home. We are grateful for his wisdom.

Thankful to be alive and well, I have spent the past few days pondering this event and what might have been. Here are some lessons I hope to pass on to others.

1. Make sure you have a CO detector. We most likely owe our lives to the one we have. There is only a difference of about $15 between a basic detector and the best on the market. Don't be afraid to splurge on something that may be the difference between life and death. I can't tell you how many people in the past few days have said to me, "After we heard your story, we checked to make sure we had a detector and checked to make sure it works." If our incident helps anyone else, it was worth it.

2.What you don't know can hurt you. Carbon monoxide is a silent killer because the gas is odorless and invisible. We literally staked our lives and health on the effectiveness of a carbon monoxide detector. If we had a faulty detector, no matter how certain our trust in it, it would not have saved. Or, if we had known a detector may help us one day, but hadn't acted on that knowledge by having one, the results may have been disastrous.

Mankind suffers from an even worse killer: sin. We are all infected and though most of us may be aware of its effects at some level, there are countless people all around the world who need to know there is a Savior. What they don't know about Christ will affect their lives for eternity. Those who hear and are willing to stake their lives on His promise of deliverance from sin will be saved from eternal death.

3. Our lives are not our own. I realize with a new awareness that I am utterly dependent on God for life, even for my next breath. I am thankful for His love and care, and trust He has a purpose in giving us more time on this earth. I wrote to a friend this week, "I pray this is my 'wake-up call' to give all of my life 100% to the gospel, so long as I have a life to give." Out of gratitude to Him, I want my life and my family's life to be ever devoted to living for God's kingdom and glory. Yet truly my greatest gratitude is not for our protection this past Saturday night, but that God has raised me to newness of life in Christ. My life already belongs wholly to Him.

"For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain." Phil. 1:21

catch the wind...and soar

She was sick this week for 3 days with a stomach bug, but made a dramatic comeback within an hour. So full of joy was she at this sudden recovery she became giddy, scattering her sunshine in all directions. Today was Parent's Day at school, and she embraced it with all she was worth, glad to get back to school and her friends, although worried they might attack her with hugs in their glee at seeing her again.

We moved him to his sister's room, where he could sleep by himself. He generally got more sleep which did wonders for his ability to cooperate cheerfully. We visited a 3-year-old gymnastics class, where he sat mesmerized, except for numerous pleas to be able to "go do tricks, too." We're counting the days until his first class next Wednesday. Thanks to a paper airplane-making book given to his brother as a Christmas gift, we have found a way he can be fascinated for hours, making and flying airplanes.

Motherhood is filled with loops and twists, much like my son's airplanes when they are aloft in flight. While the prospect of firm ground underfoot beckons one to safe, shallow love, the true adventure is in the air. There are spectacular views from the heights and breath-taking moments when plunging to the depths. The dips and climbs whisper sweet hints of a Savior's love and giving of Himself for His own. They are hints alone, for the best of my love cannot touch the heights nor depths of His.

a delicious way to start the day

My grandma gave me this granola recipe at Thanksgiving. I like to make it on the weekend, and it makes enough to last at least the entire week for two people. VERY good!

Celebration Granola
6 c. old-fashioned oats
1 c. chopped pecans
1 c. chopped walnuts
1 c. toasted wheat germ or flaxseed
1 1/2 c. packed brown sugar (I backed this down to 1 c. to reduce sugar...still good!)
1/2 c. canola oil
1/2 c. maple syrup
1 c. dried cherries or cranberries
1 c. raisins

In a large bowl, combine the oats, nuts, and wheat germ; set aside. In a small saucepan, combine the brown sugar, oil and syrup. Cook and stir over medium heat for 2-3 min. or until heated through. Pour over oat mixture and toss to coat.

Transfer to two greased cookie sheets. Bake at 300 for 20-25 min. or until golden brown, stirring once. Cool.

Sprinkle with cherries and raisins; toss to combine. Store in airtight container.

Yield 12 cups.

gentle Shepherd

It was another one of "those" days. Thunderclouds of discouragement and doom formed over my head, and I let them gather there unheeded. John 10 was the chapter of study as I prepared to lead a discussion over its contents the following day. I knew God's truth lay before me, but only gazed at it as if from afar. A Good Shepherd? Green pastures? Who am I kidding? This unruly, disgruntled sheep looked around the meadow and saw mostly dirt, rough ground, and rain threatening to fall. I felt like an uncared for, lonely sheep, without any sign of a shepherd in sight.

Yet, bleating out prayers, I called for Him. And He did come, as He always does, because I am His sheep and He loves me. Certainly not because I deserve to know His presence. And He changed my perspective.

The rocks, the rough ground I see is a verdant meadow in His eyes. He is my Shepherd, He promised green pastures, and therefore I can trust that is exactly where He has placed me. It is here, in this pasture, that I will learn to trust, to hear His voice, and to find in Him all I need. He taught me this prayer:

Good Shepherd, will you please grant me:
Your strength in my weakness,
Your wisdom in my perplexity,
Your patience as I wait on You,
Your light in my darkness,
Your life in my death,
Your presence in my loneliness,
Your love in my brokenness,
Your glory in my cross?

And this sheep, satisfied in her Master's care, lay down by still waters and found rest.

weekend in review

Micah wound down his birthday celebrating this weekend. He had a party with friends at a local gym. Fifth grade boys are the perfect age and a blast to hang out with. I think Eric and I had as much fun as the boys did! We look forward to seeing what God will do in the lives of these boys as they grow up.
The best parts of the evening: swimming, chip dip, and a game of basketball.

David, a next door neighbor (pictured above with the ball), was the youngest of the bunch. He did well standing up to boys two years older, but was completely worn out by the end of the evening!

Eric got a workout, too!

Rachel practicing an Upward cheer, interrupted by a thoughtless spectator trotting off to the concession stand. Her first game was Saturday and she glowed and smiled through every minute.

snow day and other tidbits

OK, so they just had a 17 day break from school. Funny how easy it was to welcome another, especially when it meant the world was at a stand-still around us. I'm not sure hot chocolate at 9:00 a.m. was the best idea for the 3-year-old. Yet it was a good way to warm up after playing in the snow!

Eric often sits down with the kids at the table at night to draw. It is amazing how quickly the paper and pencils come out when they see what he's up to with Josiah. Let the creative juices flow! The older kids drew dragon kingdoms while Eric and Josiah drew airplanes.

Rachel's school challenged each student to read six hours in the month of January, in exchange for free tickets to Six Flags. I think she reads at least this much anyway, but it's still nice to see her cozy up with a book. Her pick? Calvin and Hobbes.

A boy and his cat. Isn't that a sweet sight? Micah is reading one of his many magazines. Keeping him immersed in good reading material is like trying to keep a growing boy in clothes. We love the library!

This morning started out less promising than yesterday with a somewhat grumpy boy and increasingly grumpy momma, but then things got better. I anticipated Josiah's request for another treasure hunt during our preschool time, and he ran through the house, looking for items I thought up. We set a timer to know when to be done. Then he ran through the house, putting everything back. (He thinks this is a game!) We followed up with another favorite but calmer activity: playing with shaving cream. The picture shows why I should never leave the room when the shaving cream is out, even for just a minute. The apron was a nice idea but it was the ONLY thing he was wearing that DID NOT get messy. I'm used to changing Josiah's shirts and wiping up messes several times a day, so it wasn't really a big deal. The smiles and more cheerful attitudes were worth it.

day by day

The day started in a rather promising way. The much-longed-for snow day became a reality and my older kids bounded out of bed with more energy than would be displayed on a school day. The three-year-old fed off their energy, bouncing around to the usual "tune" that seems to play in his head and lend joy to his heart. By 8:15, all three kids were out in the snow, playing with the neighbors. I could hear the shouts and laughter from inside my warm, comfortable house, and smiled as I considered our plans for the day.

At 9:00 the kids arrived inside, warmed up with hot chocolate, and scampered over to the neighbor's house for more play. Josiah and I remained behind, and delved into our preschool activities for the morning. He was exuberant, playful, and cooperative. We embarked on a treasure hunt around the house to find the items mentioned in Goodnight Moon. He loved it, and was almost giddy with pleasure.

Then came trouble. Our treasure hunt was done, but Josiah wanted it to continue. For the next hour, we battled. He didn't like the music we listened to, didn't want to go potty, and refused to find a toy to play with. Our lunch exchange went something like this:

"I want a waffle with peanut butter." (He'd eaten the lunch I'd prepared and was still hungry, so I agreed to fix him this extra.) Then: "No peanut butter! Syrup!" Knowing full well how Josiah literally "waffles" in his choices, I repeated our rule that once a choice is made, he must stick to it. (I figure James 5:12 "Let your 'Yes' be yes and your 'No,' no" has a loose but powerful application here.) "No waffle! Bread!" (Because I had insisted on peanut butter. I repeated the rule.)

And so it went, until naptime, which he also fought with a vengeance. But now he is blissfully asleep, and I pray he will wake up with a cooperative attitude.

Josiah's strong will continues to manifest itself, constantly challenging me to refine my parenting skills and grow in godly character. How do I get through each day triumphantly, rather than succumb to the constant, almost moment-by-moment challenge to my authority? That is a question I place before God daily, and I find that He is giving me some answers.

1. I must never indulge in self-pity.
This doesn't mean I am not tempted, at times, to wonder why God wired Josiah the way He did, or how He could expect me to maintain my sanity through the tough moments. Yet I learned long ago that our greatest shortcoming can become our greatest asset when placed in the hands of God. "'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." (2 Cor. 12:9) Josiah's strong will, placed in the hands of his heavenly Father, could one day become a mighty force for God's Kingdom. My weakness in parenting him causes me to lean on God in dependence, for wisdom and power to get through each day. I don't do so perfectly, but trust I am being perfected.

2. I post rules and stick to them.
I stumbled across this strategy during our Christmas break, when all of our children needed a visible reminder of our expectations. We sat down together and came up with rules to guide our interactions. It was an epiphany for Josiah. He began to understand we do not arbitrarily discipline him, but do so based on a code of conduct. He willingly repeats each rule when reminded and often will quickly place himself under its authority. I also wrote out the consequences for not following a rule, and have a guide to follow--outside of my emotions--for each infraction.

3. I have Josiah rephrase his demands as requests.
"I want a banana!" becomes, "Mommy, may I please have a banana?" A simple request is easier on Mom or any authority figure than a demand that is issued at the top of one's lungs.

4. I carefully choose my battles.
There are some things I just must let go...such as how my directions are carried out, so long as the way they are done is safe and in compliance. You have no idea how much activity can go on when one little boy is to be sitting on the toilet, but so long as the job is done, I have to let some of this extra energy go without notice.

5. I pray for a cooperative spirit to be formed in this dear boy.
God is answering this prayer. Often in these past months, Josiah has pushed and pushed me, and finds I am not smiling at his behavior. "Smile at me, Mommy?" he asks. "No, Mommy is not pleased, and I am not smiling. If you want to make Mommy smile, you need to obey," has been my reponse. This seems to be sinking in! Yesterday when I prepared to spray Josiah's hair with water and comb it down, he started to run away as usual and then walked back. "Make Mommy smile?" he asked as he stood still.

Yes, dear one. I am smiling!! May you long to please God and find His favor as well, through faith in Christ and willing obedience to His commands. I pray your well-trained response to my authority will one day be your response to His.

compassion challenge: what's so special about a birthday?

From the time I was young, there have been 6 dates that have embedded themselves in my memory: February 20, March 1, March 6, April 19, December 8, and December 11. What was so special about those days? Someone in my family celebrated a birthday or anniverary!! As I grew, I collected dates in my head: June 21 (my best friend since kindergarten...we don't even talk anymore, but I still remember her on her birthday!), Dec. 19 (another friend I no longer see); when I met my husband-to-be, May 10 was another date to remember and never forget. Soon we were married: July 9, then my brother and his wife: August 2. A new baby added to our family: Dec. 31!! Add in nieces, nephews, more children, more anniversaries, more dear friends... that's a lot of dates to keep track of!

And so I did, mentally, for many years. A few were jotted on the calendar haphazardly to help my memory. But lately, I've noticed I'm starting to miss things: my parents anniversary a few years ago (sorry, Mom and Dad), a brother's birthday, more special dates here and there. If I can factor in all the dates I do remember, my track record is pretty good. If you're the person I forgot, it doesn't matter if my accuracy is 90%, you were the one left forgotten.

I've been forgotten at times, too, and understand the grace that is extended to those of us with short-term memory loss. Yet I long to recognize and celebrate these special dates of loved ones. Why make such a concerted effort? It was perhaps best expressed as I read this thought recently in a book by H. Clay Trumbull:

"When the anniversary of a child's birthday comes around, a loving parent is likely to emphasize and illustrate to the child the parental love which should make that season a season of gladness and joy to the child...It is not that the parents are lacking in love at other times; but it is that the child shall have fresh reminders, at these anniversary seasons, of that love which is unfailing throughout the year."

Life is short, busy, and I am often caught up in a whirlwind of activity that is involved in raising children, serving in ministry, and running a household. God has placed many special, beloved people in my life that I love, and yet I often forget or neglect to express it to them. Birthdays and anniversaries are a wonderful opportunity to give those people "fresh reminders of that love which is unfailing throughout the year."

I'm hoping this year I don't miss one!

goal for a new year and beyond

"Do all the good you can, in all the ways you can, to all the souls you can, in every place you can, at all the times you can, with all the zeal you can, as long as ever you can."
-John Wesley