Happy Birthday, Micah!!

Today, our New Year's Eve "baby" turned 11.
Micah bounded out of bed to open his present. He was not at all disappointed to receive six books! It was fun to shop the Newbury award section at Barnes and Noble to find good books for him. He immediately dove into Across Five Aprils, a story set in the time of the Civil War.








Micah's love for dragons runs long and deep. He prefers lemon cake to any other flavor.

We somehow fit 24 family members in our home for a family party. It was good to have so many who were able to come! Aunt Michelle gathered a crowd of children around her as she taught them how to play a new game, Labyrinth. Five-year-old Asher took the lead.

It seems like only a few days have passed since I held this dear baby in my arms for the first time. These days of childhood are sweetly treasured and pass far too quickly. Yet I love the young man Micah is becoming: compassionate, kind, generous, and tender to the things of God. He's a blessing to our family in many ways! Happy birthday, son!!!

a special ray of sunshine

After battling an undetected (though certainly not symptom-free!) medical condition for three months and undergoing treatment for two more months, our little girl finally feels better. It's amazing how much more she smiles now that she's feeling well! Here's a special moment shared with Kit.

it's back

Shortly after beginning the book Raising Unselfish Children in a Self-Absorbed World, I began to post a weekly "compassion challenge" to be completed by our family. After a couple of months, I removed this from my blog. However, months later I still see the effects of these challenges in myself, my husband and our children. Seeing that it helped us to take our eyes off ourselves for at least a moment, and perhaps even made us a bit more like Jesus, I'm reissuing the challenge. Join us if you see ways you'd like to challenge yourself!

more than a New Year's resolution...

ABANDONED

Utterly abandoned to the Holy Ghost!
Seeking all His fulness at whatever cost;
Cutting all the shore-lines, launching in the deep
Of His mighty power--strong to save and keep.

Utterly abandoned to the Holy Ghost!
Oh! the sinking, sinking, until self is lost!
Until the emptied vessel lies broken at His feet;
Waiting till His filling shall make the work complete.

Utterly abandoned to the will of God;
Seeking for no other path than my Master trod;
Leaving ease and pleasure, making Him my choice,
Waiting for His guidance, listening for His voice.

Utterly abandoned! no will of my own;
For time and for eternity, His, and His alone;
All my plans and purposes lost in His sweet will,
Having nothing, yet in Him all things possessing still.

Utterly abandoned! 'tis so sweet to be
Captive in His bonds of love, yet so wondrous free;
Free from sin's entanglements, free from doubt and fear,
Free from every worry, burden, grief or care.

Utterly abandoned! oh, the rest is sweet,
As I tarry, waiting, at His blessed feet;
Waiting for the coming of the Guest divine,
Who my inmost being shall perfectly refine.

Lo! He comes and fills me, Holy Spirit sweet!
I, in Him, am satisfied! I, in Him, complete!
And the light within my soul shall nevermore grow dim
While I keep my covenant--abandoned unto Him!

-Author Unknown, taken from Streams in the Desert

this one says it all...

One of Rachel's bitty twins, adopted by Josiah and renamed "baby Jesus," and his new firetruck. Perfect Christmas sleep companions! (No, he didn't fall out of bed.)

Merry Christmas!

"For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Of the increase of his government and peace there will be no end. He will reign on David's throne and over his kingdom, establishing and upholding it with justice and righteousness from that time on and forever. The zeal of the Lord Almighty will accomplish this." Isaiah 9:6-7

sharing Christmas with children

I've been reading a book recently that was first published in 1890, called Hints on Child Training. The author is H. Clay Trumbull, great-grandfather to Elisabeth Elliot. More thoughts from this book will be coming, but for now I will simply quote a few lines from his chapter on giving added value to a child's Christmas:

"He who would make children happy must do for them and do with them, rather than merely give to them. He must give himself with his gifts, and thus imitate and illustrate, in a degree, the love of Him who gave Himself to us, who is touched with the sense of our enjoyments as well as our needs, and who, with all that He gives us, holds out an expectation of some better thing in store for us: of that which passeth knowledge and understanding, but which shall fully satisfy our hopes and longings when at last we have it in possession."

It seems fitting that Christmas would be a time of hopes and longings satisfied, as the hope for a Savior had occupied the hearts of God's people from the time He first hinted at the Promised One in Gen. 3:16. And it is a season of surprises, as the Son came not as expected by the people but yet exactly as God Himself had planned from the beginning. So we, as parents, may instill a bit of this expectation, longing, and excitement in our interactions with our children in this Season of seasons, the advent of the Christ Child.

We didn't plan on making Santa pancakes a part of our family tradition. Santa is not the centerpiece of our celebrating, but he is tolerated and winked at in a good-natured way. After making these for the kids one year, they insisted they make a comeback year after year. They are easy to make: Reddi-Whip, cherry pie filling, a banana, a few chocolate chips, and of course pancakes.

Josiah was obviously surprised and delighted!!

A friend made these adorable snowmen with her niece and nephews, and then shared her craft instructions and materials with us. The kids had a ball making these even though it meant a lot of waiting while Mom manned the hot-glue gun.

Since the older kids were preschoolers, we've made a paper chain, pulling off one link each day to count down the days until Christmas. Micah always adds 6 more links to count down to his New Year's Eve birthday. I thought perhaps this year the older kids might be getting too old to want to do this, but Micah was the one who asked to assemble the chain.

This year we chose to reenact the Christmas story with this tool from Family Life. Every night the kids open a present with one of the characters from the story, and we read the corresponding Bible verses. This has been a wonderful way to get the very active 3-year-old involved.

Another great tradition for most families is riding around town, looking at Christmas lights. This activity took on added meaning a few years ago when we began to share with the kids that Christmas lights help us remember Jesus is the light of the world, and His people shine a beautiful light in a dark world when they live their lives for Him.

managing emotions

Emotions...they are powerful, motivating, and a part of the human experience. When managed properly, they can lead to great good, and when managed poorly, they can tear lives apart. Often the way we respond to life's circumstances has its root in our emotions. What is the secret to managing them well?

I've been pondering these things for some time. Over the past several years, our family has been through a series of events that have brought out some of the deepest, most hidden emotions of my heart. I've glimpsed the good, the bad, and the ugly of my soul and sense that it is only the tip of the iceburg. As I heard wisely taught recently, our trials do not make our character, but reveal it. It seems I've been found out, and I see I'm sorely lacking. But hallelujah, the story God is writing in my character is not yet done!

One of my older children has currently reached a time in life when emotions threaten to rule. In an attempt to help that child, I recently wrote out a step-by-step response to handling emotions. What I penned has been what I've been learning throughout these past years and personal struggles, now for the first time captured in words. I quickly recognized my own need to walk through these steps in a systematic way. I then rewrote them with myself in mind, promising my child this was something Mom needed to work on, too. I share our steps here only hoping to help others as well.

Steps to wisely handling emotions:

1. Time out. Get alone before I say or do something I will regret. (Life doesn't always allow us to run to another room...this may mean a mental time out while I think through how to respond!)

2. Talk to God. Ask Him to give me a new attitude as I obey Him.
Ps. 62:8 “Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.”

3. Think. Fill my mind with right thinking from God’s Word.
Phil. 4:8 “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”

2 Cor. 10:5 “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”

Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

Quite often, right thinking leads to right emotions, which leads to right action. This is the most important step in handling our emotions. It is best to fill our minds with appropriate scripture that will transform a response of the flesh to a response of the Spirit.

Some examples of right thinking:
(for my child)
*Mom loves me and she doesn’t want me to grow up having a bad attitude toward others.
*I need to learn to be less selfish, and God is giving me an opportunity to learn this.
*I’m learning to be responsible when I help out.

(for myself)
*God loves me enough to correct my pride, selfishness, and wrong attitudes toward others.
*I’m learning to be a godly mother (also insert wife, friend, etc.) and servant of God as we go through these things together.
*I need to learn to express my anger (fear, love, frustration... insert emotion) in a more God-honoring way. How would He have me respond?

4. If I have hurt someone, tell the person I offended that I am sorry. Talk out any hurt feelings.
James 5:16 “Therefore confess your sins to each other…”

5. Try again. Grace means I am able to try again and again as I grow to be more like Jesus.
James 1:4 “Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”

on a completely different note

Thanks to a tip from my parents, we took the kids out to gawk at this light display tonight. It was definitely worth the peek and the wait! It was my children's second trip, and they saw things they hadn't noticed the first time. For those in town, this is 204 Robert Drive, not far from Parkside.

to be like this mom

It is interesting to note the Bible is so quiet regarding the years of Jesus' upbringing. There seems to be much wisdom in this. As the mother of our Lord, wouldn't it be wonderful if moms could know her methods? Certainly we would long to copy them in bringing up our own children! Yet instead, we are left not with a record of methods but one of attitude. This is the most instructive word from God for any mother: to have Mary's heart of acceptance for God's will and a love for Jesus that makes the humble, ordinary tasks required of us most sacred.

Title: The Mother of the Lord

Author: Elisabeth Elliot

We see her first, that little Mary (may I say little? I think she was a teenager), as a simple village girl in a poor home in an out-of-the-way place. She is bending over her work when suddenly the light changes. She raises her eyes. A dazzling stranger stands before her with a puzzling greeting. He calls her "most favored one" and tells her the Lord is with her. She is stunned. I don't believe her thought is of herself (Who am I? or Am I ever lucky!). Mary is troubled. She discerns at once that this has to do with things infinitely larger than herself, far beyond her understanding. What can it mean?

The angel does not weigh in immediately with the stupendous message he has been sent to deliver. He first comforts her. "Don't be afraid, Mary." Mary. She is not a stranger to him. He is assuring her that he has the right person. He explains what she has been chosen for--to be the mother of the Son of the Most High, a king whose reign will be forever. She has one question now--not about the Most High, not about an eternal king--those are things too high for her--but motherhood is another matter. She understands motherhood, has been looking forward to it with great happiness. Her question is about that: "How can this be? I am still a virgin." He does not really explain. He simply states a mystery: "The power of the Most High will overshadow you." He goes on to tell her of another miraculous pregnancy, that of her old cousin Elisabeth, well past child-bearing age. "God's promises can never fail," he says. They won't fail for you, Mary. Rest assured.

How will the girl respond? She is at once totally at the disposal of her Lord (she sees that the visitor is from Him). Whatever the mystery, whatever the divine reasons for choosing her, whatever the inconveniences, even disasters (broken engagement? stoning to death--the punishment of a fornicator?) which she may be required to face, her answer is unequivocal and instant: "Here I am. I am the Lord's servant; let it be as you have told me." Anything, Lord.
We see her next with Elisabeth, who, by the manner of Mary's greeting and by her own baby's sudden movement in her womb, knows immediately that God has chosen Mary to be the mother of the Lord. They don't sit down over coffee and chatter about the gynecology or the practical logistics or what people are going to say. Mary sings her song of gladness, of thoroughgoing acceptance of the gift, of trust in the Mighty One.

We see her sweating in the cold of the stable, putting her own life on the line, as every mother must do, in order to give life to somebody else. We see her with the tough shepherds, breathlessly telling their story of the glory of the Lord and the singing of the angel choir. Everyone else is astonished (a word which comes from "thunderstruck"), but Mary does not join the excited babble. She is quiet, treasuring all these things, pondering them deep in her heart. We see her with the mysterious travelers from the East bringing their lavish gifts. She says nothing as they kneel before the baby she holds in her arms. We see her on the donkey again, on the roundabout journey to Egypt because her husband has been given a secret message in a dream. She does not balk, she does not argue.

We see her in the temple handing over her baby to old Simeon, to whom the Holy Spirit has revealed the child's amazing destiny: a revelation to the heathen, glory to Israel. But to Mary he gives the far deeper message of suffering, for there is no glory that is not bought by suffering: her son will suffer--he will be a sign which men reject; she, his mother, will suffer, will be pierced to the heart. No question or answer from her is recorded. Again we know only her silence.

We see nothing of her for twelve years--days and nights, weeks and months, years and years of caring for the infant, the toddler, the little boy, the adolescent. There is no mention of any of that. Mary has no witness, no limelight, no special recognition of any kind. She is not Mother of the Year. Hers is a life lived in the ordinary necessity of their poverty and their humanity, no one paying attention to her attention to Him. Whatever the level of her comprehension as to the nature of this boy, she knows He was given to her. She remembers how. She treasures all this. She ponders things in the silence of her heart. Did she share any of them with Joseph? Could she? Could he receive them? We know next to nothing of the dynamics between them. She was content to be silent before God.

The apostle Paul tells us we are "hidden with Christ in God" (Colossians 3:3, NIV}. There is mystery there, but when I think of the life of Mary, I see some facets of that mystery that I missed when I read the apostle. Hers was a hidden life, a faithful one, a holy one--holy in the context of a humble home in a small village where there was not very much diversion. She knew that the ordinary duties were ordained for her as much as the extraordinary way in which they became her assignment. She struck no poses. She was the mother of a baby, willing to be known simply as his mother for the rest of her life. He was an extraordinary baby, the Eternal Word, but His needs were very ordinary, very daily, to his mother. Did she imagine that she deserved to be the chosen mother? Did she see herself as fully qualified? Surely not. Surely not more than any other woman who finds herself endowed with the awesome gift of a child. It is the most humbling experience of a woman's life, the most revealing of her own helplessness. Yet we know this mother, Mary, the humble virgin from Nazareth, as "Most Highly Exalted."

I am thanking God that unto us a Child was born. I am thanking Him also that there was a pure-hearted woman prepared to receive that Child with all that motherhood would mean of daily trust, daily dependence, daily obedience. I thank Him for her silence. That spirit is not in me at all, not naturally. I want to learn what she had learned so early: the deep guarding in her heart of each event, mulling over its meaning from God, waiting in silence for His word to her.
I want to learn, too, that it is not an extraordinary spirituality that makes one refuse to do ordinary work, but a wish to prove that one is not ordinary--which is a dead giveaway of spiritual conceit. I want to respond in unhesitating obedience as she did: Anything You say, Lord.
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.

the boys

Josiah still talks about playing with buttons, an activity from our first week of preschool. I recently found a container of buttons at the store. (I returned our borrowed buttons to my mom, that way they can be a special thing to do at her house.) We sorted by color, number of holes, favorites, and then found Josiah's favorite way to play: bulldozing a road.

Micah, heavily armed while practicing piano. You never know when you might encounter an ambush.



Today I had the opportunity to try out the video feature on my camera. Josiah loves fingerplays and learned both of these at BSF. (He's pointing to a snowman on the tablecloth while he sings.) He learned how to count to three from Dora the Explorer. I think this is a post that will be most loved by grandparents, and perhaps an aunt or uncle who live far away...

thanking God for the hard things

Taken from Streams in the Desert, compiled by Mrs. Charles Cowman

Thankful for the Thorns
"Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong" (2 Cor. 12:10).

The literal translation of this verse gives a startling emphasis to it, and makes it speak for itself with a force that we have probably never realized. Here it is: "Therefore I take pleasure in being without strength, in insults, in being pinched, in being chased about, in being cooped up in a corner for Christ's sake; for when I am without strength, then am I dynamite."

Here is the secret of Divine all-sufficiency, to come to the end of everything in ourselves and in our circumstances. When we reach this place, we will stop asking for sympathy because of our hard situation or bad treatment, for we will recognize these things as the very conditions of our blessing, and we will turn from them to God and find in them a claim upon Him. --A. B. Simpson

George Matheson, the well-known blind preacher of Scotland, who recently went to be with the Lord, said: "My God, I have never thanked Thee for my thorn. I have thanked Thee a thousand times for my roses, but not once for my thorn. I have been looking forward to a world where I shall get compensation for my cross; but I have never thought of my cross as itself a present glory.

"Teach me the glory of my cross;
teach me the value of my thorn.
Show me that I have climbed to Thee by the path of pain.
Show me that my tears have made my rainbows."
"Alas for him who never sees
The stars shine through the cypress trees."

a good read

This is a great article by John Piper on teaching unregenerate children to be good.

great website for truly good food!

Last night I attended a cookie exchange for the women in our neighborhood. The hostess served this wonderful dip, taken from the website http://www.eatbetteramerica.com/. This recipe may not appeal to every taste bud (I doubt anyone else in my house would touch it) but there are many other "healthified" recipes to try. The gal who made this left out the olives and only used 1/4 cup of the feta cheese, so you can tweak it to your tastebuds' delight!

Greek Layered Dip

2 whole wheat pita (pocket) breads (6 inch)
Cooking spray
1 container (7 or 8 oz) plain hummus
1 container (6 oz) fat-free Greek plain yogurt
1 tablespoon chopped fresh parsley
1 teaspoon fresh lemon juice
1/8 teaspoon pepper
1 medium plum (Roma) tomato, seeded, chopped
1/3 cup pitted kalamata olives, quartered
1/3 cup finely chopped seeded cucumber
1/2 cup crumbled feta cheese (2 oz)
1/4 cup chopped green onions (4 medium)
1 teaspoon olive oil
1/2 medium cucumber, sliced
1 medium green or red bell pepper, cut into strips

1 Heat oven to 350°F. Split each pita bread horizontally to make 2 rounds. Cut each round into 6 wedges. Arrange on ungreased large cookie sheet, rough surface up. Spray with cooking spray (about 5 seconds).
2 Bake 8 to 10 minutes or until golden brown and crisp; cool.
3 Meanwhile, spread hummus on shallow serving platter or in pie plate. In small bowl, mix yogurt, parsley, lemon juice and pepper; spread evenly over hummus. Top with tomato, olives, chopped cucumber, feta cheese and onions. Drizzle with olive oil.

Nutritional Information: 1/4 cup dip, 2 chips and 4 veggies: Calories 100 (Calories from Fat 40); Total Fat 4 1/2g (Saturated Fat 1g, Trans Fat 0g); Cholesterol 5mg; Sodium 270mg; Total Carbohydrate 12g (Dietary Fiber 2g, Sugars 3g); Protein 4g % Daily Value Vitamin A 4%; Vitamin C 20%; Calcium 6%; Iron 4% Exchanges 1/2 Starch, 1/2 Skim Milk, 0 High-Fat Meat, 1/2 Fat Carbohydrate Choices 1

a hymn of longing for the Spirit

"'If anyone is thirsty, let him come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, streams of living water will flow from within in him.' By this he meant the Spirit..." John 7:38-39

Thy mighty Love, O God constraineth me,
As some strong tide it presseth on its way,
Seeking a channel in my self-bound soul,
Yearning to sweep all barriers away.

Shall I not yield to that constraining power?
Shall I not say, O tide of Love flow in?
My God, Thy gentleness hath conquered me,
Life cannot be as it hath hither been.

Break thru my nature, mighty, heavenly Love,
Clear every avenue of thought and brain,
Flood my affections, purify my will,
Let nothing but Thine own pure life remain.

Thus wholly mastered and possessed by God,
Forth from my life, spontaneous and free,
Shall flow a stream of tenderness and grace
Loving because God loved, eternally.

called to play; called to serve

My heart began to race as I read the email from our church's choir director. He was asking for volunteers to play in an ensemble for our annual Christmas program. The musical score called for strings, flutes, and an oboe. My response was not one of excitement, but fear. I love playing (and hiding) in our orchestra when I can, but this was an ensemble, with fewer instruments and more exposure. That would mean, gulp, that people could hear me.

The oboe is a quirky instrument. The double reed mouthpiece makes playing difficult as the sound is hard to control and breathing tricky. As far as I know, it is the only instrument that requires the player to breathe out extra air before taking a quick breath in, which can result in a lot of light-headedness while playing. An oboe played poorly sounds much like a quacking duck crossed with a dog's squeak toy. Played well, however, it has a warm, haunting sound that is easily heard even over the rest of the orchestra.

Not many people play oboe, so when the instrument is needed, I feel fairly obligated to say yes. On the other hand, it is a difficult instrument to play and I'm far from accomplished. Multiply this high-maintenance instrument with a quiet personality and a love for playing, and you have my oboe complex.

After a couple of weeks of practice and armed with a new reed, I ventured out to the first rehearsal. The first time through the piece, I was alarmed to hear my instrument sound hopelessly out of tune. A check of the score revealed that my part was written for the English Horn, so we quickly transposed the notes and tried again. Much better...and I had a grand total of 36 notes. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all.

The choir assembled and the real rehearsal began. An acoustic guitar, violin, viola, flute, and choir voices combined to form a rich, full sound that made my heart sing along. There were a few small measures where my oboe chimed in, warmly carrying melody and harmony, picking up where others left off and weaving its part in the song of Mary's Magnificat. The beauty of it all took my breath away.

No matter how quirky our personalities may be, how much we wonder if we have anything to add to the cacophony of the lives sounding around us, when we trustfully put our lives into the hands of the Master Composer, He has a place for each willing life. Whether you sound notes of warmth, order, creativity, or precision, whether quiet or loud, there is no one else who has quite the part you can play in God's symphony of the redemption of man. It will take sacrifice, practice, and a life that is in tune with the will of God. Don't miss it for fear of making mistakes or being exposed for who you truly are. The Composer of the ages knows where to place you in the score. It may take your breath away when you see how He has woven your life together with that of others to produce something beautiful for His sake and glory.

Ephesians 2:10 "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do."

Romans 10:11 "Anyone who trusts in him will never be put to shame."

This post was written as a response to Creative Stretch #5, "something that makes your heart sing." See Erin's light-hearted post here.

food for thought from Elisabeth Elliot

This is too good not to share...for adults and children alike. "Lord, help us not to be squeezed into the world's mold when we are raising our children."

Title: Teaching Children

Author: Elisabeth Elliot

How many times between the ages of three and ten do children have to answer the only two questions adults can think of to ask them: How old are you? and What are you going to be when you grow up?

The second question may seem innocuous, but is it? In the first place, many children may be distressed at being required to make a choice which is far beyond them. In the second place, it implies that the choice is theirs. This can lead to great confusion later on. The child will grow up physically, but spiritually he will not have begun until he learns that Jesus died not only to save him from sin but in order that he should live not for himself but for Him who died (see 2 Corinthians 5:15 and l John 3:16). If a young person has been taught from childhood that he ought to "be something" without at the same time being shown that nothing is better than being God's servant, he may be preoccupied with ambitions and ideals he has gotten solely from the world. If his conception of "where it's at" has nothing to do with the Kingdom of God, he is in for trouble when it comes time to discern the Will of God. He will be setting limits to his obedience, defining the terms of his service. "For My sake" is a concept children can grasp much earlier than we generally suppose. A little boy wrote to me that he was learning to lay down his life for others. To him this meant that sometimes when he would rather play he lay down beside his little sister to help her go to sleep.

Pray that God will show you how to teach your children that life is meant to be lived for God. "You are not the owner of your own body. You have been bought, and at what a price! Therefore bring glory to God in your body" (1 Corinthians 6:20, PHILLIPS). Help your child to understand that the Lord is his Shepherd, and he is a little lamb. The Shepherd will gladly show him the right pathway if he is willing to follow.

check this out

While there are plenty of things I'm mulling over, it seems I am hitting a bit of a writer's block lately. I'll let my friend Erin save the day and share something she wrote with you. Click here to be challenged and stretched! Thank you, Erin, for this lesson, one I've referred to often after reading it the first time.