preschool ADHD...interesting fact

About two posts ago, I suggested that the child with ADHD displays behaviors typical of a preschooler except at a much higher incidence level. I found this fact yesterday to back that thinking up.

Preschool children with ADHD typically disobey twice as often and display inappropriate behavior 5 times as often as a normally-developing child. The family stress is also 3 times as high.

true or false?

For the first week of school, one of Rachel's assignments was to design a true or false test about herself. How well do you know her? Now updated with answers...

1. I'm afraid of heights. (False)
2. I like chocolate. (True!)
3. I love P.E. (False, but it is better than anticipated.)
4. I have 3 pets. (True--one dog and two cats)
5. I have a sister. (False)
6. I like Halloween more than Christmas. (False!)
7. I love hamsters. (True, and wants one desperately)
8. I'm 1 inch behind my 6th grade brother. (True, and she loved tripping everyone up with this one.)
9. I love foxes. (True!)
10. I love twist ice cream. (True)

it's official

Two days ago, we met with a psychologist and she confirmed our suspicions regarding Josiah with a diagnosis: ADHD.

Rather than feeling discouraged, I think this might have been the best thing that ever happened to him! I've looked at the symptoms over time and dismissed them. "He's a toddler, and they're full of energy, " I reasoned. "He's all boy," I told myself or heard from others.

But this summer, I took a hard look at symptoms and compared them to Josiah. They seemed to bear resemblance to one another. Here is one list of symptoms for toddlers and preschoolers with ADHD:

-Inability to sustain attention for even a few minutes
-Constantly distracted by sights and sounds around them
-Difficulty sustaining eye contact
-Able to pay attention to certain high interest things such as a favorite video game or playing outside when high energy levels are required
-Excessively hyperactive
-Always in motion
-Lack of interest in cuddling or quiet activities
-Difficulty calming down after becoming excited
-Highly impulsive: will jump off of decks, slides or out of windows, will run into the street more often
-Accident-prone
-Difficulty sleeping, may have a hard time falling asleep and may be up at 5:00 AM each morning
-Can be very talkative
-Poor social skills
-Behavioral problems, not listening, disobeying or consistent unsafe behaviors
-Can be clumsy or have underdeveloped coordination
-May grab toys from classmates, siblings or friends
-Difficulty waiting for their turn
-May be aggressive, causing fights or hitting other children

Not all of these are true of my son, but 90% are! Now I understand the up and down emotions, low tolerance for frustration, pestering of his siblings, behavior issues, lack of playing with toys, constant interrupting, and having to walk step by step through directions for activities are most likely due to ADHD. And yes, all preschoolers will exhibit these characteristics from time to time. The child with ADHD multiplies these behaviors by a factor of 10. (I've not seen that number scientifically but can attest to it experientially!)

Now I know where to look for help.

Diet-wise, we've stumbled on to more help than we would have imagined. Things are still bumpy here, but we're still learning and his body is still adjusting. Just this week, we learned that he calms down considerably when he gets enough protein. I truly wish I could have taken a video of Josiah before lunch and then after. The difference in his behavior was astounding. Before lunch, he was running at about 90 mph. After lunch, he had put his baseball cap on and walked past me, saying, "Mommy, I'm going outside to play." Did you see me use the word "walked?" And when he's running at 90 mph, it's up to me to keep him entertained; either than or he will continually pester me or the dog. He was willingly heading outside to entertain himself for a few minutes, thank you very much.

I'm just beginning to understand how his mind is wired differently for learning. He needs very concrete and step-by-step ways to learn, and the more I can involve his senses or even his entire body, the better! I was once special education teacher and should know this, but it is profoundly different to be a teacher than it is to be the parent.

So much more to learn here. I'm thankful for this journey and for the opportunity to discover more about this precious little boy.

a promising start and a new room

First day of school...the day dawned sunny, fitting in with the feelings of hope and expectation.

This year, we can walk to school. What a treat! Rachel found the 4th grade line and we waited together to go in and meet her teacher. Josiah was in charge of school supplies and comic relief.

Getting settled in her class. Her teacher, Mrs. H., is young(er than me), full of energy, and a great match for Rachel as far as we can tell. Rachel's sitting right next to a former classmate from her old school. She was one of 5 new students in her class this year. So far she loves it and comes home every day with a smile.

Micah running his first cross country meet. He was looking good at the halfway point... but struggled a bit near the end. Three of his teammates ran him to the finish line. Go Parkside! Micah loves Jr. High, especially the a la carte lunch choices. His three main teachers are all young(er than me) and he seems to like them.

Josiah's new room, painted his favorite color. It's a huge transformation from the tan walls Micah had. And we added airplanes!

trapped in time but not forever

It was an unusually perfect August evening. The air was cool, with a gentle breeze stirring the still-green leaves. The sun dazzled the world with its fading light and the park was filled with children and parents. Two of my own were there, playing with great contentment as they worked their way around the playground.

I closed my eyes and wished I could freeze this moment in time to somehow make it last forever. When I opened them, I was struck with the temporal evidence of the moment. School would soon be starting, summer would end, leaves would fall from these trees in just a few more weeks. Even the perfect weather would not hold for longer than a few more hours. Children who once delighted me with their infant, toddler, preschool, and elementary ways are growing up. My own reflection in the mirror lately reveals that 40 is not as far away as I might hope. My heart ached with the knowledge that life so quickly moves us on.

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven...He has also set eternity in the hearts of men, yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end." Ecc. 3:1, 11

I find it curious that finite beings have a longing for the infinite, until I remember it is God Himself that placed it there. I'm amazed that in His wisdom, forgiveness, and love, the infinite God entered into time through the person of His own dear Son, to reach out to the finite man He made. And one day, those of us who are trapped in time will have the opportunity to join our Maker in eternity. What a plan!

It's not just me who has these thoughts of eternity. They are in the heart of every man, woman, boy, and girl you meet. I dare myself and I dare you to ask them what thoughts they have of eternity. Then point them to the God who put those thoughts in their heart to begin with, and the Savior who makes eternity with Him possible.

Maybe it could start with the question, "Do you ever wish you could just freeze this moment?" Eternity with God, removed from the penalty, power, and presence of sin forever, will be far more glorious than any August evening.

for more information...

Check this out: http://www.school-lunch.org/.

(This is not just about school lunches, by the way! :)

changes

My mind was full as I drove Josiah to his weekly appointment to see the social worker for therapy. Should I tell her about the changes I had seen in him, or just keep quiet? As I thought through the events of the past several weeks, I decided to hold my tongue and see if she would bring the subject up herself.

When I took Josiah in to his pediatrician at the end of June, I had several concerns. Most pressing were the almost unmanageable behavior issues. The outbursts of aggression toward his siblings, the discipline that seemed to make no difference, and the impulsive actions like yelling and hitting were weighing us down. But there were other concerns as well: lack of playing with toys, sensory issues, anxiety, and frequent emotional meltdowns. Yes, some of this is expected in the behavior of a preschool boy. But these things were happening with tremendous frequency and intensity; the mom in me felt like something wasn't right. When Josiah was referred for an evaluation, I knew that somewhere down the line, someone was going to suggest medication. So I went to work researching anything natural but safe we could try before the "m" word came up. The pediatrician mentioned going gluten-free as a promising route, but I wanted to try additive-free as a first step and see how that went.

It had been about 6 weeks since I first made changes to our diet. After noting some subtle differences in behavior in just 2 weeks, I decided to join the Feingold organization and give their additive-free diet a full effort. It took weeks of mistakes, observations, tweaking, and waiting. Waiting to remove the final additive from Josiah's diet: the artificial flavoring found in his prescription-strength iron supplements. Would it make the difference we were hoping for?

The answer didn't come immediately. We had a crazy week with the county fair, face painting, paint fumes in his newly painted room, and unapproved suntan lotion (I still can't find an approved brand and decided to wait until next summer to order online). I thought I had done well changing his diet, but there were still so many places petroleum products are found, and we had to deal with those now as well. Not taking naps was not going well so we went back to laying him down in the afternoon. And then...I noticed the yummy chicken tenders I had been buying had chicken broth with artificial flavoring. After so many steps forward at first, I now had a very unhappy child on my hands. What was going on? I had read some children actually seem to go through a time of "detox" and this seemed to match the description, but there were now obviously several factors to work through.

Then on Tuesday morning, it was like a switch had been flipped. Josiah awoke happy, self-controlled, and even had some very compliant moments. I watched him with delight all day, as he played with his sister, occupied himself with toys barely touched for months, and worked puzzles from beginning to end. What was going on? Would it last?

Wednesday was the same. Then Thursday. Here we were, ready to see Miss D., his social worker. She had been very perceptive with Josiah in the past month. He walked into her room and played with her for 5o minutes. I sat in the waiting room, praying she would notice the changes.

The door opened and Josiah came running out, giving me a hug and beckoning me inside. Miss D. met me at the door.

"Leah, what have you been doing with Josiah? He's like a different boy today!" These were the very words I had been waiting for! I eagerly shared our grand experiment with the social worker, and she encouraged us to keep up the hard but good work. She noted Josiah's ability to focus, his decreased anxiety, and increased compliance. I shared with her the changes I had seen at home regarding sensory issues, interactions with his siblings, and new ways he was playing. I'm not sure who was more excited, me or Miss D. She eagerly asked that we come back next week so she could see how things were going. I'm eager to see as well, and have finally stopped holding my breath.

I feel we are blessed. Josiah is only 3, and we have so much time ahead of us. Now I can talk to him about using his words to tell others what he needs instead of using his "hits" to get what he wants. Discipline has become effective again! We can talk about obedience without hearing him say, "Jesus makes me sad" because he finds it almost impossible to obey. In fact, he happily complies (much of the time!) knowing it is a way he can trust and obey the Lord! Changing his diet at this age has not been much of an issue because I am still very much in control of what goes on the table and into his mouth. Actually, if it weren't for these changes in our family's diet, I might never have had him next to me on the stool, hugging me and saying, "Mommy, I just love to bake!"

I'm trying not to look ahead. Cold and flu season looms, along with brightly colored and artificially flavored antibiotics. There are alternatives* but it will take an honest talk with our pediatrician to make them work. When he goes to school, there are many food issues to consider: birthday treats, school lunches, craft projects using food...but we have time to work on this and many others have gone before us who are willing to share their hard-won wisdom. And Halloween is right around the corner. I'd better check out some of those natural candy store alternatives! Or try exchanging candy for a prized toy: in Josiah's case, probably an airplane.

In the meantime, I'm enjoying getting to know the little boy who has always been there, just waiting to be set free.

*Some antibiotics and medications can be compounded without added flavorings or colorings. There are other ways to get around the additives as well.

is it really worth it?

It's hard to believe it's only been 4 weeks since we officially started the Feingold program. At first it was quite tricky, and I wouldn't necessarily advise a person to begin while on vacation, like we did. However, when you are desperate, like we were, you make things work. As time has passed, things are getting easier. Either that or we are adjusting to a new normal! At the prodding of another (thanks, Beth), here are the details:

-Cut out all artificial colors.
This includes things like FD&C Yellow No. 5. Artificial colors are made from petroleum, and are likely to be one of the most problematic additives in our food. Studies have shown they cause everything from behavior issues to a link with cancer. And because of their over-use in food, kids who are sensitive to them are also sensitive to their use in lotions, shampoos, air fresheners, paint (including face paint and yes, we did have problems after letting Josiah have his face painted at the fair), and all kinds of other places petroleum is used. Hey, we just decreased our need for foreign oil! And we weren't even trying...

-Cut out all artificial flavors.
This includes vanillin, a synthetic vanilla made from...the waste left over after manufacturing paper products. Yum, huh? This is the only flavoring clearly labeled by its name, but others are listed as artificial "lemon-flavor, grape flavor," etc. What is it that we are eating, exactly? There are no regulations to govern artificial flavors. They can be made from anything. Most are derived from petroleum.

-Cut out the preservatives BHT, BHA, and TBHQ.
This one is tricky. Go get a box of crackers or cereal and look at the ingredients. Chances are, you'll find it listed. If it's not, chances are it's still there. It is often sprayed on the packaging which allows it to leech into the food. This saves food companies tons of money because it extends the shelf life of food products. These preservatives are also hidden in food because they can be used in oils used to prepare the food, and yet not be listed on the ingredients. Preservatives are even used in most of the Vitamin A Palmitate added to milk, which means we have to buy organic if we want to use a lowfat variety. (Vitamin A is naturally found in whole milk and therefore not added.) And again, these preservatives are products of petroleum.

-Cut out aspartame and other artificial sweeteners.
This is the easiest...we were already doing it.

-Cut out natural salicylates and aspirin products.
This is the least understood part of the diet. However, apparently there is a relationship between aspirin, artificials, and a compound naturally found in many fruits and a few vegetables. Some kids can eventually add these foods back into their diet once their sensitivity to these compounds decreases (there seems to be a build-up over time due to over-exposure) . This cuts out most berries, apples, oranges, other fruits, and (gulp!) tomatoes.

-Cut out chocolate.
This is not part of the diet, officially. But it is a trigger for Josiah. He loves the carob I use to substitute. I don't like it at all, but if he's happy, I'm happy. Chocolate gives me migraines, so less headaches for me are a good thing, too.

So what can we eat?

Lots!!! I have a whole book filled with researched choices of prepared food, and plenty "always safe" choices (like flour, sugar, some cheeses; many canned, frozen, and fresh produce) are available. We eat watermelon, pears, pineapple, mango, kiwi, cantaloupe, and lots of other fruits. I say "we" loosely. Josiah likes about 3 of the acceptable fruits so that is a bit frustrating. But he likes pear juice, found in the baby aisle, so that's something! Almost all veggies are fine, if I could just get my kids to eat them.

I've found acceptable margarine (not many choices, but my local grocery store does carry one), graham crackers (sadly, the only ones I can find are $5 a box at the health food store), cereal, snack food, ice cream, yogurt, and pre-made cookies. However, in some cases it pays for me to use homemade. I've yet to find an acceptable bread for less than $3 a loaf, so I make my own. Cookies are better homemade than bought, so I make those myself, too. Making them myself means we are consuming less sugar...hooray! I tried a great recipe for white pizza, so we're making do without tomato sauce for now. I have a recipe for un-tomato sauce and un-ketchup, but I've stopped short at buying beets to use for that. If we get desperate, I suppose I could try it...

And yes, it's all worth it. More on that in my next post!

thumbs up!

Rachel and I have now attended two of the Kids Can Cook series through the Center for Healthy Living at OSF. Last month was summer snacks, this month was lunch crunch--to help with healthy choices for lunches. These classes are great!! The kids dice and assemble the food themselves but parents get to sample, too. Not only do we get new ideas to try at home, the dietician talks the kids through the food pyramid and why good nutrition is so important (somehow this is more effective than Mom just saying, "Eat your vegetables, please!") Lots of ideas are given to pack more nutrition into the snacks and meals we are already enjoying. Rachel has now tried things like spinach leaves, refried beans, and pita bread...and liked them! We've found a few things we don't like but came up with adjustments we could make to the recipes to make them anyway. Great classes, worth the price; I'd highly recommend them!!! Here are a few sample recipes from last night's class:

Mandarin Ham and Pineapple Pita
1/3 c. light Miracle Whip
1/3. cup plain non-fat yogurt
2 c. hame, cooked and diced
1 can (8 0z.) pineapple tidbits in lite syrup, drained
1 can (8 oz.) mandarin oranges in lite syrup, drained

In a bowl, stir the Miracle Whip and yogurt together. Add remaining ingredients and fold until well blended. Chill until serving time. Stuff mixture into pita. 4 servings.

Rachel didn't care for the Miracle Whip, but we agreed this would most likely be fabulous if we substituted vanilla yogurt instead of the first two ingredients. We could easily play around with the fruits as well!

Southwest Pinwheel Meal
1 6-8 inch soft shell tortilla, whole wheat if desired
1 T. fat-free refried beans
2 T. prepared salsa
2 oz. thin shaved sliced turkey breast
2 T. grated cheddar cheese
4 spinach leaves, torn

Spread refried beans on top of the tortilla. Next, spread salsa on top. Lay the turkey on top of the salsa. Take the spinach leaves and tear them into little pieces on top of turkey. Sprinkle with cheese. Roll the soft shell up, cut pinwheel style, and enjoy.

Fruit Salsa Quesadilla
Salsa:
2 medium strawberries, diced
5 red grapes
1/2 small banana, diced
(feel free to substitute any fruit you have on hand)
Quesadilla:
1 6-8 inch whole grain soft shell tortilla
2 T. cream cheese or peanut butter
2 T. all fruit jam
1 T. dark chocolate chips (used for the antioxidants!)

Wash and prepare fruit. Mix fruit together in a bowl. On a clean flat surface, spread cream cheese or peanut butter and then the jam on the soft shell. Top with fruit salsa mixture. Sprinkle with dark chocolate chips. Fold in half and enjoy!

maybe our air is on too high?

This is what my crazy kids are doing today during the extreme heat advisory posted for Central IL:

In their minds, it is a perfect day to "explore the arctic."

Remembering the fair...

Conference judging for cooking...watching Rachel shine.

Petting the rabbits...again and again!

Where else can you watch a llama costume show? The winners: Little Red Riding Hood and her "grandmother."

John

Deere

Tractors!

A real combine...

the corn table...

and face painting!

Enjoying rides in the midst of another Central IL heatwave.

An interview with Rachel and her alien dog...and just a step behind Reserve Best of Class, according to the judge.

Reserve Best of Class for cats!

Already thinking about next year...childcare, sketching, and

maybe Aerospace in a few more years!

training a little disciple

"But I don't want to..."

These are the words that I hear most often when I give my youngest son a direction. Granted, he's strong-willed, so it doesn't surprise me to hear them anymore. However, to a parent who greatly desires and expects obedience, they never cease to be a bit offensive not only to my ears but also to my heart. God has entrusted this little will of steel to me to mold and shape, so I prayed for wisdom, took Josiah up into my lap, and told him this story from Luke 5:

There was once a young man named Simon. Simon loved to fish. He loved it so much that when he grew up, he decided to become a fisherman. Every night Simon got in a boat, rowed out into the lake, and caught fish. He knew where the best fishing spots were, and he was a very good fisherman.

One night, Simon went out into the lake just as he always did. He threw out his net, pulled it in, and looked. No fish. So he threw out his net again, pulled it in, and looked again. Still no fish. So he tried again, all night long. But he didn't catch anything.

The next morning Simon rowed his boat in to shore. He got out of the boat and began to wash his nets. While he was doing this, he looked up and saw Jesus coming toward him. Jesus asked Simon if He could use his boat. Simon said yes, and let Jesus use his boat as a place to sit and teach a large crowd of people. Simon listened very carefully to the words Jesus said, and began to love Jesus very much.

When Jesus was done teaching, He turned to Simon. "Put out into deep water, and let down the nets for a catch." Simon didn't like Jesus' direction. He was a good fisherman, and he had spent all night fishing and hadn't caught anything. He didn't think that going back out into the water was a good idea at all. But Simon loved Jesus. So he said, "Master, we've worked hard all night and haven't caught anything. But because you say so, I will let down the nets."

Simon obeyed Jesus by rowing his boat out to the deep water and putting out his nets. You'll never believe what happened next! The nets began to fill with fish!!! One fish, two fish, so many fish began to fill the nets that Simon could hardly believe his eyes. His nets were so full they began to break. Simon fell down at Jesus' feet and worshipped Him, saying, "Go away from me, Lord; I am a sinful man." Jesus was kind to Simon even though he had not wanted to obey. He blessed Simon, and Simon knew Jesus was treating him in a way he didn't deserve. He was showing Simon great love, and Simon worshipped Jesus because of it.

Josiah, God has given you one command, "Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right." Because God loves you and knows what is best for you, He gave you a Mommy and Daddy to help you learn to do what is right. Even when you don't want to obey, remember how much Jesus loves you. When Mommy gives you a direction, I want you to begin thinking, "Because you say so, I will." You can obey God by obeying Mommy, just like Simon obeyed Jesus. When you obey God this way, you will be showing your love to Jesus.

Zechariah 3

Jesus, Thy blood and righteousness
My beauty are, my glorious dress;
’Midst flaming worlds, in these arrayed,
With joy shall I lift up my head.

Bold shall I stand in Thy great day;
For who aught to my charge shall lay?
Fully absolved through these I am
From sin and fear, from guilt and shame.

The holy, meek, unspotted Lamb,
Who from the Father’s bosom came,
Who died for me, e’en me to atone,
Now for my Lord and God I own.

Lord, I believe Thy precious blood,
Which, at the mercy seat of God,
Forever doth for sinners plead,
For me, e’en for my soul, was shed.

When from the dust of death I rise
To claim my mansion in the skies,
Ev’n then this shall be all my plea,
Jesus hath lived, hath died, for me.

Jesus, the endless praise to Thee,
Whose boundless mercy hath for me—
For me a full atonement made,
An everlasting ransom paid.

Lord, I believe were sinners more
Than sands upon the ocean shore,
Thou hast for all a ransom paid,
For all a full atonement made.

O let the dead now hear Thy voice;
Now bid Thy banished ones rejoice;
Their beauty this, their glorious dress,
Jesus, Thy blood and righteousness.