this one says it all...

One of Rachel's bitty twins, adopted by Josiah and renamed "baby Jesus," and his new firetruck. Perfect Christmas sleep companions! (No, he didn't fall out of bed.)

Merry Christmas!

"For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Of the increase of his government and peace there will be no end. He will reign on David's throne and over his kingdom, establishing and upholding it with justice and righteousness from that time on and forever. The zeal of the Lord Almighty will accomplish this." Isaiah 9:6-7

sharing Christmas with children

I've been reading a book recently that was first published in 1890, called Hints on Child Training. The author is H. Clay Trumbull, great-grandfather to Elisabeth Elliot. More thoughts from this book will be coming, but for now I will simply quote a few lines from his chapter on giving added value to a child's Christmas:

"He who would make children happy must do for them and do with them, rather than merely give to them. He must give himself with his gifts, and thus imitate and illustrate, in a degree, the love of Him who gave Himself to us, who is touched with the sense of our enjoyments as well as our needs, and who, with all that He gives us, holds out an expectation of some better thing in store for us: of that which passeth knowledge and understanding, but which shall fully satisfy our hopes and longings when at last we have it in possession."

It seems fitting that Christmas would be a time of hopes and longings satisfied, as the hope for a Savior had occupied the hearts of God's people from the time He first hinted at the Promised One in Gen. 3:16. And it is a season of surprises, as the Son came not as expected by the people but yet exactly as God Himself had planned from the beginning. So we, as parents, may instill a bit of this expectation, longing, and excitement in our interactions with our children in this Season of seasons, the advent of the Christ Child.

We didn't plan on making Santa pancakes a part of our family tradition. Santa is not the centerpiece of our celebrating, but he is tolerated and winked at in a good-natured way. After making these for the kids one year, they insisted they make a comeback year after year. They are easy to make: Reddi-Whip, cherry pie filling, a banana, a few chocolate chips, and of course pancakes.

Josiah was obviously surprised and delighted!!

A friend made these adorable snowmen with her niece and nephews, and then shared her craft instructions and materials with us. The kids had a ball making these even though it meant a lot of waiting while Mom manned the hot-glue gun.

Since the older kids were preschoolers, we've made a paper chain, pulling off one link each day to count down the days until Christmas. Micah always adds 6 more links to count down to his New Year's Eve birthday. I thought perhaps this year the older kids might be getting too old to want to do this, but Micah was the one who asked to assemble the chain.

This year we chose to reenact the Christmas story with this tool from Family Life. Every night the kids open a present with one of the characters from the story, and we read the corresponding Bible verses. This has been a wonderful way to get the very active 3-year-old involved.

Another great tradition for most families is riding around town, looking at Christmas lights. This activity took on added meaning a few years ago when we began to share with the kids that Christmas lights help us remember Jesus is the light of the world, and His people shine a beautiful light in a dark world when they live their lives for Him.

managing emotions

Emotions...they are powerful, motivating, and a part of the human experience. When managed properly, they can lead to great good, and when managed poorly, they can tear lives apart. Often the way we respond to life's circumstances has its root in our emotions. What is the secret to managing them well?

I've been pondering these things for some time. Over the past several years, our family has been through a series of events that have brought out some of the deepest, most hidden emotions of my heart. I've glimpsed the good, the bad, and the ugly of my soul and sense that it is only the tip of the iceburg. As I heard wisely taught recently, our trials do not make our character, but reveal it. It seems I've been found out, and I see I'm sorely lacking. But hallelujah, the story God is writing in my character is not yet done!

One of my older children has currently reached a time in life when emotions threaten to rule. In an attempt to help that child, I recently wrote out a step-by-step response to handling emotions. What I penned has been what I've been learning throughout these past years and personal struggles, now for the first time captured in words. I quickly recognized my own need to walk through these steps in a systematic way. I then rewrote them with myself in mind, promising my child this was something Mom needed to work on, too. I share our steps here only hoping to help others as well.

Steps to wisely handling emotions:

1. Time out. Get alone before I say or do something I will regret. (Life doesn't always allow us to run to another room...this may mean a mental time out while I think through how to respond!)

2. Talk to God. Ask Him to give me a new attitude as I obey Him.
Ps. 62:8 “Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.”

3. Think. Fill my mind with right thinking from God’s Word.
Phil. 4:8 “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”

2 Cor. 10:5 “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”

Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

Quite often, right thinking leads to right emotions, which leads to right action. This is the most important step in handling our emotions. It is best to fill our minds with appropriate scripture that will transform a response of the flesh to a response of the Spirit.

Some examples of right thinking:
(for my child)
*Mom loves me and she doesn’t want me to grow up having a bad attitude toward others.
*I need to learn to be less selfish, and God is giving me an opportunity to learn this.
*I’m learning to be responsible when I help out.

(for myself)
*God loves me enough to correct my pride, selfishness, and wrong attitudes toward others.
*I’m learning to be a godly mother (also insert wife, friend, etc.) and servant of God as we go through these things together.
*I need to learn to express my anger (fear, love, frustration... insert emotion) in a more God-honoring way. How would He have me respond?

4. If I have hurt someone, tell the person I offended that I am sorry. Talk out any hurt feelings.
James 5:16 “Therefore confess your sins to each other…”

5. Try again. Grace means I am able to try again and again as I grow to be more like Jesus.
James 1:4 “Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”

on a completely different note

Thanks to a tip from my parents, we took the kids out to gawk at this light display tonight. It was definitely worth the peek and the wait! It was my children's second trip, and they saw things they hadn't noticed the first time. For those in town, this is 204 Robert Drive, not far from Parkside.

to be like this mom

It is interesting to note the Bible is so quiet regarding the years of Jesus' upbringing. There seems to be much wisdom in this. As the mother of our Lord, wouldn't it be wonderful if moms could know her methods? Certainly we would long to copy them in bringing up our own children! Yet instead, we are left not with a record of methods but one of attitude. This is the most instructive word from God for any mother: to have Mary's heart of acceptance for God's will and a love for Jesus that makes the humble, ordinary tasks required of us most sacred.

Title: The Mother of the Lord

Author: Elisabeth Elliot

We see her first, that little Mary (may I say little? I think she was a teenager), as a simple village girl in a poor home in an out-of-the-way place. She is bending over her work when suddenly the light changes. She raises her eyes. A dazzling stranger stands before her with a puzzling greeting. He calls her "most favored one" and tells her the Lord is with her. She is stunned. I don't believe her thought is of herself (Who am I? or Am I ever lucky!). Mary is troubled. She discerns at once that this has to do with things infinitely larger than herself, far beyond her understanding. What can it mean?

The angel does not weigh in immediately with the stupendous message he has been sent to deliver. He first comforts her. "Don't be afraid, Mary." Mary. She is not a stranger to him. He is assuring her that he has the right person. He explains what she has been chosen for--to be the mother of the Son of the Most High, a king whose reign will be forever. She has one question now--not about the Most High, not about an eternal king--those are things too high for her--but motherhood is another matter. She understands motherhood, has been looking forward to it with great happiness. Her question is about that: "How can this be? I am still a virgin." He does not really explain. He simply states a mystery: "The power of the Most High will overshadow you." He goes on to tell her of another miraculous pregnancy, that of her old cousin Elisabeth, well past child-bearing age. "God's promises can never fail," he says. They won't fail for you, Mary. Rest assured.

How will the girl respond? She is at once totally at the disposal of her Lord (she sees that the visitor is from Him). Whatever the mystery, whatever the divine reasons for choosing her, whatever the inconveniences, even disasters (broken engagement? stoning to death--the punishment of a fornicator?) which she may be required to face, her answer is unequivocal and instant: "Here I am. I am the Lord's servant; let it be as you have told me." Anything, Lord.
We see her next with Elisabeth, who, by the manner of Mary's greeting and by her own baby's sudden movement in her womb, knows immediately that God has chosen Mary to be the mother of the Lord. They don't sit down over coffee and chatter about the gynecology or the practical logistics or what people are going to say. Mary sings her song of gladness, of thoroughgoing acceptance of the gift, of trust in the Mighty One.

We see her sweating in the cold of the stable, putting her own life on the line, as every mother must do, in order to give life to somebody else. We see her with the tough shepherds, breathlessly telling their story of the glory of the Lord and the singing of the angel choir. Everyone else is astonished (a word which comes from "thunderstruck"), but Mary does not join the excited babble. She is quiet, treasuring all these things, pondering them deep in her heart. We see her with the mysterious travelers from the East bringing their lavish gifts. She says nothing as they kneel before the baby she holds in her arms. We see her on the donkey again, on the roundabout journey to Egypt because her husband has been given a secret message in a dream. She does not balk, she does not argue.

We see her in the temple handing over her baby to old Simeon, to whom the Holy Spirit has revealed the child's amazing destiny: a revelation to the heathen, glory to Israel. But to Mary he gives the far deeper message of suffering, for there is no glory that is not bought by suffering: her son will suffer--he will be a sign which men reject; she, his mother, will suffer, will be pierced to the heart. No question or answer from her is recorded. Again we know only her silence.

We see nothing of her for twelve years--days and nights, weeks and months, years and years of caring for the infant, the toddler, the little boy, the adolescent. There is no mention of any of that. Mary has no witness, no limelight, no special recognition of any kind. She is not Mother of the Year. Hers is a life lived in the ordinary necessity of their poverty and their humanity, no one paying attention to her attention to Him. Whatever the level of her comprehension as to the nature of this boy, she knows He was given to her. She remembers how. She treasures all this. She ponders things in the silence of her heart. Did she share any of them with Joseph? Could she? Could he receive them? We know next to nothing of the dynamics between them. She was content to be silent before God.

The apostle Paul tells us we are "hidden with Christ in God" (Colossians 3:3, NIV}. There is mystery there, but when I think of the life of Mary, I see some facets of that mystery that I missed when I read the apostle. Hers was a hidden life, a faithful one, a holy one--holy in the context of a humble home in a small village where there was not very much diversion. She knew that the ordinary duties were ordained for her as much as the extraordinary way in which they became her assignment. She struck no poses. She was the mother of a baby, willing to be known simply as his mother for the rest of her life. He was an extraordinary baby, the Eternal Word, but His needs were very ordinary, very daily, to his mother. Did she imagine that she deserved to be the chosen mother? Did she see herself as fully qualified? Surely not. Surely not more than any other woman who finds herself endowed with the awesome gift of a child. It is the most humbling experience of a woman's life, the most revealing of her own helplessness. Yet we know this mother, Mary, the humble virgin from Nazareth, as "Most Highly Exalted."

I am thanking God that unto us a Child was born. I am thanking Him also that there was a pure-hearted woman prepared to receive that Child with all that motherhood would mean of daily trust, daily dependence, daily obedience. I thank Him for her silence. That spirit is not in me at all, not naturally. I want to learn what she had learned so early: the deep guarding in her heart of each event, mulling over its meaning from God, waiting in silence for His word to her.
I want to learn, too, that it is not an extraordinary spirituality that makes one refuse to do ordinary work, but a wish to prove that one is not ordinary--which is a dead giveaway of spiritual conceit. I want to respond in unhesitating obedience as she did: Anything You say, Lord.
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.

the boys

Josiah still talks about playing with buttons, an activity from our first week of preschool. I recently found a container of buttons at the store. (I returned our borrowed buttons to my mom, that way they can be a special thing to do at her house.) We sorted by color, number of holes, favorites, and then found Josiah's favorite way to play: bulldozing a road.

Micah, heavily armed while practicing piano. You never know when you might encounter an ambush.



Today I had the opportunity to try out the video feature on my camera. Josiah loves fingerplays and learned both of these at BSF. (He's pointing to a snowman on the tablecloth while he sings.) He learned how to count to three from Dora the Explorer. I think this is a post that will be most loved by grandparents, and perhaps an aunt or uncle who live far away...